Something serious..
..
..don't know what to say actually. My girlfriend is leaving this country we like to call Sweden. She's going to fuckin' China to teach fuckin' chines bitches fuckin' english.
It's kinda sad. I mean. Ever since I moved out she have been there with me almost every day. It will be kinda weird beeing all alone. Just me and the cat. Well well.. I think we will manage. Hopefully.
What am I suppose to feel right now? Ofcourse I'm happy for my girlfriend but I still can't stop thinking of that she actually is leaving for like three months. God damn it will be weird waking up saturday morning being all alone.
Aaw.. have to go back to work.
To M:
I truly whish you get the best time ever when you're in China. Love you girl.
..don't know what to say actually. My girlfriend is leaving this country we like to call Sweden. She's going to fuckin' China to teach fuckin' chines bitches fuckin' english.
It's kinda sad. I mean. Ever since I moved out she have been there with me almost every day. It will be kinda weird beeing all alone. Just me and the cat. Well well.. I think we will manage. Hopefully.
What am I suppose to feel right now? Ofcourse I'm happy for my girlfriend but I still can't stop thinking of that she actually is leaving for like three months. God damn it will be weird waking up saturday morning being all alone.
Aaw.. have to go back to work.
To M:
I truly whish you get the best time ever when you're in China. Love you girl.
Hm.. for some fucking reason I couldn't add an topic to this post. THANK YOU MICROSOFT!
Yes I know, I'm at the moment using a PC with MS Windows. I'm a shame. I mean, when using a Mac everything just works! You don't really have to do anything.
For those of you who don't believe me, check this out.
Buy and use a PC!
1. You have to choose between 3 million different computers depending of what you are about to use it for. (1-3 hours)
2. When done. You have to get this enormous box home. This box is often very ugly, heavy and just useless. (1 hour)
3. Unpack the PC. (30 min)
4. Plug it in. (3-30 min)
5. BLUESCREEN!! (Yeah PC uses Windows, and Windows equals fucking bluescreen)(15 min)
6. You just remembered that you haven't even installed Windows yet. (1 min)
7. Install Windows. (3 hours)
8. Configure Windows (1 hour)
9. Install Antivirus/spyware-programme (1 hour)
10. Scan your PC for spyware/virus (3 hours)
11. Enjoy! (For about 2 days before you have to do step 5, 7, 8, 9 and10 again)
Buy and use a Mac!
1. Choose between about ten products. (30 min)
2. Carry the nice design-box home. (It has a very nice handle ontop of this box) (30min)
3. Unpack the Mac. (5 min)
4. PLug it in. (5 min)
5. Enjoy! And it just works! No Antivirus/spyware-programme!
So, which computer is the best? And don't you say: "PC! You can't play games on a Mac" THAT'S FALSE! You CAN play almost any game on a Mac.
Just because you can't play everything directly in OS X. So what? Use fucking Parallels Desktop. It couldn't be easier.
And this is why you should buy a Mac!
Okey, that was some serious shit. Let's write about something not so serious.
How about fucking ducks. I like ducks. Remember the ugly duckling who actually was a swan? He that fellow wasn't that good looking. At least not as good looking as me! I'm so good looking that even Hugh Hefner would be yellous. Not that he is good looking either but he has a lot, A LOT of girls. And he's like 75 years old. What's up with that? It's just crazy.
Well well... off I go!
Yes I know, I'm at the moment using a PC with MS Windows. I'm a shame. I mean, when using a Mac everything just works! You don't really have to do anything.
For those of you who don't believe me, check this out.
Buy and use a PC!
1. You have to choose between 3 million different computers depending of what you are about to use it for. (1-3 hours)
2. When done. You have to get this enormous box home. This box is often very ugly, heavy and just useless. (1 hour)
3. Unpack the PC. (30 min)
4. Plug it in. (3-30 min)
5. BLUESCREEN!! (Yeah PC uses Windows, and Windows equals fucking bluescreen)(15 min)
6. You just remembered that you haven't even installed Windows yet. (1 min)
7. Install Windows. (3 hours)
8. Configure Windows (1 hour)
9. Install Antivirus/spyware-programme (1 hour)
10. Scan your PC for spyware/virus (3 hours)
11. Enjoy! (For about 2 days before you have to do step 5, 7, 8, 9 and10 again)
Buy and use a Mac!
1. Choose between about ten products. (30 min)
2. Carry the nice design-box home. (It has a very nice handle ontop of this box) (30min)
3. Unpack the Mac. (5 min)
4. PLug it in. (5 min)
5. Enjoy! And it just works! No Antivirus/spyware-programme!
So, which computer is the best? And don't you say: "PC! You can't play games on a Mac" THAT'S FALSE! You CAN play almost any game on a Mac.
Just because you can't play everything directly in OS X. So what? Use fucking Parallels Desktop. It couldn't be easier.
And this is why you should buy a Mac!
Okey, that was some serious shit. Let's write about something not so serious.
How about fucking ducks. I like ducks. Remember the ugly duckling who actually was a swan? He that fellow wasn't that good looking. At least not as good looking as me! I'm so good looking that even Hugh Hefner would be yellous. Not that he is good looking either but he has a lot, A LOT of girls. And he's like 75 years old. What's up with that? It's just crazy.
Well well... off I go!
To anonymous..
Well okey.. this is for you who are to cowardly to write your own name when you leave a comment. I have no fuckin' idea who you are, but I wouldn't be surprised if you're one of mine fucked up friends who's just jerking around with me.
Anyway.. if you really are someone that I don't know I will now write a friendly post about YOU.. yeye.. fucktard!
Are you for real? I mean you are so pathetic that you aren't able to get your own girlfriend? You have to find someone online, threw another persons weblog? Hm.. I don't even know what to say.
Let me guess. You are about sixteen years old? Never kissed a girl? Live at home with mom and dad? Oh how cute. You probably don't even know how to brush your fucking teeths. It's just lame.
So.. to finish things up a bit. Get yourself a life. Go pick up a fine women and get laid. Wanna know why? Because here you wont be seeing any women. Not my women anyway. She's too fuckin' hot for you!
But.. just to be nice. I will post a picture of another fine lady that I think will suite you better.
Just so you know.. I have an idea about who you are. And if I'm right thats too bad.
Anyway.. if you really are someone that I don't know I will now write a friendly post about YOU.. yeye.. fucktard!
Are you for real? I mean you are so pathetic that you aren't able to get your own girlfriend? You have to find someone online, threw another persons weblog? Hm.. I don't even know what to say.
Let me guess. You are about sixteen years old? Never kissed a girl? Live at home with mom and dad? Oh how cute. You probably don't even know how to brush your fucking teeths. It's just lame.
So.. to finish things up a bit. Get yourself a life. Go pick up a fine women and get laid. Wanna know why? Because here you wont be seeing any women. Not my women anyway. She's too fuckin' hot for you!
But.. just to be nice. I will post a picture of another fine lady that I think will suite you better.
Just so you know.. I have an idea about who you are. And if I'm right thats too bad.
Filthy experience in the world of abuse and soft jars with jam..
Look at that topic. That cant be healthy. SOFT jars with jam! That's just crazy. I'm crazy.. I mean.. I write about all this crap. And I'm still alive!? If this was the real world and if all of us wasn't living in an artificial reality with soap opras and computerscreens, we would all be damned to the flames of hell for a long time ago!
Well okey. I have to tell you a secret. Promise to keep quiet about it. Our world as we use to call planet Earth isn't actually round. Its shaped like a round square with purple dots. (!!!) It's true! I am not shitting you! Well.. maybe just a little bit.
I really don't know how I come up with all these ideas I have. All this junk I write about. YOU FUCKING CORPULENT PIG! Oh.. sorry. That wasn't suppose to happen. It just did. I'M SORRY! OKEY?!
And oh.. I almost forgot. It was my birthday last monday! Sweet! Let's see now. My last birthday I was turning something like four. Or sixteen. I can't remember. Anyway.. Last monday I turned eightynine. I think. So now I'm allowed to buy my own beer and booze! Hell yeah!
From all that crazy crap to something a little bit more serious.
What is it? Is it a cellphone? Is it an iPod? Is it a new lame smartphone from Nokia or SonyEricsson? Or is it an elephant? NO! It's the iPhone! I don't know what to tell you about it actually. It's just amazing! It's a regular cellphone with an iPod! And the developers of this spectacular invention is Apple! The fuckin' rule! Not long ago I bought myself an MacBook, also from Apple, and I get more and more amazed by it every single day!
So.. all of you fucktards who's reading this fucked up shit. Go and buy yourself a MacBook, and when you get the chance, an iPhone! NOW!
One hour later...
Just came back from eating burgers at Corner. Then we took a quickie to the sun and back. I must say that it's kinda' hot over there. Almost like 58°C. And THAT is hot!
Well well.. this was almost a serious post. Hm.. that wasn't true. The day that I write a serious post George W. Bush will take his bicycle down to Iraq and Afghanistan and apologize to all the families whos relatives he have killed. And that don't sound so likely. Right?
Oh well.. gotta go save Robin Hood from the vicious buttplugs og pinetrees!
Well okey. I have to tell you a secret. Promise to keep quiet about it. Our world as we use to call planet Earth isn't actually round. Its shaped like a round square with purple dots. (!!!) It's true! I am not shitting you! Well.. maybe just a little bit.
I really don't know how I come up with all these ideas I have. All this junk I write about. YOU FUCKING CORPULENT PIG! Oh.. sorry. That wasn't suppose to happen. It just did. I'M SORRY! OKEY?!
And oh.. I almost forgot. It was my birthday last monday! Sweet! Let's see now. My last birthday I was turning something like four. Or sixteen. I can't remember. Anyway.. Last monday I turned eightynine. I think. So now I'm allowed to buy my own beer and booze! Hell yeah!
From all that crazy crap to something a little bit more serious.
What is it? Is it a cellphone? Is it an iPod? Is it a new lame smartphone from Nokia or SonyEricsson? Or is it an elephant? NO! It's the iPhone! I don't know what to tell you about it actually. It's just amazing! It's a regular cellphone with an iPod! And the developers of this spectacular invention is Apple! The fuckin' rule! Not long ago I bought myself an MacBook, also from Apple, and I get more and more amazed by it every single day!
So.. all of you fucktards who's reading this fucked up shit. Go and buy yourself a MacBook, and when you get the chance, an iPhone! NOW!
One hour later...
Just came back from eating burgers at Corner. Then we took a quickie to the sun and back. I must say that it's kinda' hot over there. Almost like 58°C. And THAT is hot!
Well well.. this was almost a serious post. Hm.. that wasn't true. The day that I write a serious post George W. Bush will take his bicycle down to Iraq and Afghanistan and apologize to all the families whos relatives he have killed. And that don't sound so likely. Right?
Oh well.. gotta go save Robin Hood from the vicious buttplugs og pinetrees!
Work and knifes
Step 1. Carv out a new shape on 380 boxes
Step 2. Put the 380 boxes in a nice pile
Step 3. Take one box at the time and glue it so it actually looks like a box.
Step fuckin' 4. Do this with threehoundred-fuckin'-eighty boxes!
Hm. That was boring to write about. Let's write about something else. Like.. paperbags, or dogs, or purple flowers with telephones! Aaw. I don't know. I'm to hungry to write about anything actually.
Okey.. On my table at the moment I have so much junk and crap I can't barely see my computer.
And my back hurts. It really does. And it's your fault! YES YOU! YOUR FUCKIN' DAMN FAULT!
That's because you are not flawless like me.. I'm the only flawless person in the universe! I am RoboCop so what did you expect?
Okey.. here's a conversation I had with Santa Claus before
ZH: Hi you fucking fuck.
Santa: Hello (like a schoolgirl)
ZH: So.. I heard you like raindeers?
Santa: Yes I do.
ZH: MWUHAHAHAH!! PUSSY!!
*BANG*
Santa: What was that?
ZH: I farted.
Santa: ...
ZH: Fucktard.
Santa: I like my little helpers.
ZH: I bet you do.
Santa: Yes.
ZH: I've seen you take them in the ass.
Santa: That's not true
ZH: Yes it is, you fucker.
Santa: Buhuu (Crying)
ZH: I've also saw when you took Rudolfs nose up your own ass. Just like a freaking butplug.
Santa: Nooooo! No one was supposed to see that!
ZH: Well I did! Mwuhaha!
Santa: Fuck
ZH: What did you say?
Santa: I said fuck.. Fuck.. FUUCK!!
ZH: WTF!?
Santa: La la la la la.. (jumping around like Pippi Longstockings)
And the ZH was still like: WTF m8!?
ZH: Santa.. don't pour gasoline all over yourself.
Santa: Weee!!
ZH: Have you gone mad?
Santa: No TV, and no beer make Santa go crasy!
ZH: PUT DOWN THE LIGHTER! You can't fuckin' put yourself on fire.
Santa: I can't?
ZH: Well.. you CAN! But it's not good for you. It will hert
Santa: Are you sure?
ZH: Yes I'm fucking sure. Now drop the lighter.
Santa: ... Hm.. ... ..
ZH: ...
Santa: I don't belive you.
ZH: Well.. suit yourself.
CHABAAAANG!
And that is the story about how Santa Claus commited suicide. Maybe he was a japanese after all?
Step 2. Put the 380 boxes in a nice pile
Step 3. Take one box at the time and glue it so it actually looks like a box.
Step fuckin' 4. Do this with threehoundred-fuckin'-eighty boxes!
Hm. That was boring to write about. Let's write about something else. Like.. paperbags, or dogs, or purple flowers with telephones! Aaw. I don't know. I'm to hungry to write about anything actually.
Okey.. On my table at the moment I have so much junk and crap I can't barely see my computer.
And my back hurts. It really does. And it's your fault! YES YOU! YOUR FUCKIN' DAMN FAULT!
That's because you are not flawless like me.. I'm the only flawless person in the universe! I am RoboCop so what did you expect?
Okey.. here's a conversation I had with Santa Claus before
ZH: Hi you fucking fuck.
Santa: Hello (like a schoolgirl)
ZH: So.. I heard you like raindeers?
Santa: Yes I do.
ZH: MWUHAHAHAH!! PUSSY!!
*BANG*
Santa: What was that?
ZH: I farted.
Santa: ...
ZH: Fucktard.
Santa: I like my little helpers.
ZH: I bet you do.
Santa: Yes.
ZH: I've seen you take them in the ass.
Santa: That's not true
ZH: Yes it is, you fucker.
Santa: Buhuu (Crying)
ZH: I've also saw when you took Rudolfs nose up your own ass. Just like a freaking butplug.
Santa: Nooooo! No one was supposed to see that!
ZH: Well I did! Mwuhaha!
Santa: Fuck
ZH: What did you say?
Santa: I said fuck.. Fuck.. FUUCK!!
ZH: WTF!?
Santa: La la la la la.. (jumping around like Pippi Longstockings)
And the ZH was still like: WTF m8!?
ZH: Santa.. don't pour gasoline all over yourself.
Santa: Weee!!
ZH: Have you gone mad?
Santa: No TV, and no beer make Santa go crasy!
ZH: PUT DOWN THE LIGHTER! You can't fuckin' put yourself on fire.
Santa: I can't?
ZH: Well.. you CAN! But it's not good for you. It will hert
Santa: Are you sure?
ZH: Yes I'm fucking sure. Now drop the lighter.
Santa: ... Hm.. ... ..
ZH: ...
Santa: I don't belive you.
ZH: Well.. suit yourself.
CHABAAAANG!
And that is the story about how Santa Claus commited suicide. Maybe he was a japanese after all?
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